If you weren't always an urbanite...Explain your transition!

juiceinkirkwood · PostNov 19, 2009#12009-11-19T20:49+00:00

So I've wondered before how many people have looked up my posts here on UrbanSTL and found the posts I made when living in southern Illinois, dreaming of moving to the city some day.

You can attribute it to just having no urban experience at all, but some of my first posts was my wanting to move "downtown." Now, I will give myself this; while many, many, many suburban St Louisans still have no idea that "downtown" is a neighborhood and not anything within city limits, I really meant "downtown" when asking. I was in college and planning on coming up and getting a high paying job and living in a penthouse.

I was applying for jobs in the area and had a good lead at Enterprise Rent-A-Car, but then my wife got pregnant and dropped a bombshell; she no longer wanted to move away from family. Completely understandable. So I abandoned my lead at Enterprise and took a job in southern Illinois. I asked on the forum how anyone could expect ANYONE to want to move downtown when there is no Wal Mart nearby. I was serious. I didn't realize that little retail stores and other grocers existed, or at least WHY the existed when Wal Mart is already out there. Back to my job in southern Illinois; it was the worst job I've ever had...worse than my "ground maintenance" job I had at Ace Hardware for 3 months when I was 16. Worse than McDonald's, worse than Target. So after 3 months, I got a job in Creve Coeur, and moved to Fairview Heights.

So then began my suburban life. I bragged to friends that still lived in southern Illinois by saying things like "Here it's not 'do you want to go to Applebee's, but which Applebee's do you want to go to?" And I was dead. freakin. serious. I ate at Applebee's, fast food joints, and TGI Fridays. I occasionally got a wild hair and wanted to try something in the city, but rarely did.

I then posted on the forum, after Xing told me not to "rule out moving to the city" when I posted "Diggin' the metro east," "Why should I move to the city? Every time I ask, people say 'but watch where you go' and things like that." I just didn't get why anyone would recommend moving to the city when there is obviously no safe areas.

With a 38 mile commute to work after the 64 closure, I decided it was time for a move...to the city. I moved to the city and immediately got "it." I have now been in the city for a year and a half, never eat at anything but locally owned establishments (save for my fast food runs, of course), and Applebee's and other crap chains are no longer even a thought or consideration when asking "where should we eat?"

So my transition went like this;

1. Rural person wanting to move downtown - still may have happened, but had a kid and didn't have the funds for it, especially since wife wouldn't be working now

2. Suburbanite not understanding why I should move to the city when its obviously unsafe (lived in Fairview Heights for 8 months)

3. Dogtown resident who loves the city and hated the suburbs and suburbanites

4. Dogtown resident who loves the city and respects where people choose to live, but still try to direct them to the city when I can

Assuming we last in Dogtown long enough, I hope to get my son in to the Roe @ Wilkinson magnet 2 blocks up the street. Then, when we buy, we can definitely consider the city.

Alex Ihnen · PostNov 19, 2009#22009-11-19T22:28+00:00

This will be quick:

1) born and raised in small town (6K residents) Indiana

2) went to college

3) traveled abroad (Australia, Italy)

4) realized "life" (jobs/fun/friends/the unexpected) was in the city

5) followed girlfriend, now wife, to St. Louis

6) rented in CWE and U-City, bought in FPSE

It's really about jobs and education for me. I can't imagine living in a city any smaller than Cincinnati or Indianapolis simply due to the number of job opportunities, cultural events and education options.

In the end I got nothin' against a small town, but all my friends are in a big town. In fact I can breathe in a big town, have myself a ball in a big town... I guess you can take the boy out of Indiana, but.... sorry.

lukethedrifter · PostNov 20, 2009#32009-11-20T03:06+00:00

Grover wrote:This will be quick:

1) born and raised in small town (6K residents) Indiana

2) went to college

3) traveled abroad (Australia, Italy)

4) realized "life" (jobs/fun/friends/the unexpected) was in the city

5) followed girlfriend, now wife, to St. Louis

6) rented in CWE and U-City, bought in FPSE

It's really about jobs and education for me. I can't imagine living in a city any smaller than Cincinnati or Indianapolis simply due to the number of job opportunities, cultural events and education options.

In the end I got nothin' against a small town, but all my friends are in a big town. In fact I can breathe in a big town, have myself a ball in a big town... I guess you can take the boy out of Indiana, but.... sorry.

Very good call.

/you're wife's hot. what can i say?

juiceinkirkwood · PostNov 20, 2009#42009-11-20T03:14+00:00

Grover wrote:This will be quick:

1) born and raised in small town (6K residents) Indiana

2) went to college

3) traveled abroad (Australia, Italy)

4) realized "life" (jobs/fun/friends/the unexpected) was in the city

5) followed girlfriend, now wife, to St. Louis

6) rented in CWE and U-City, bought in FPSE

It's really about jobs and education for me. I can't imagine living in a city any smaller than Cincinnati or Indianapolis simply due to the number of job opportunities, cultural events and education options.

In the end I got nothin' against a small town, but all my friends are in a big town. In fact I can breathe in a big town, have myself a ball in a big town... I guess you can take the boy out of Indiana, but.... sorry.

Exactly my brother. The job possibilities are so limited in smaller towns. In southern Illinois we have SIU-C which is our largest employer, but that's just about it unless you want to work in a factory where you'll get laid off tomorrow.

MattnSTL · PostNov 20, 2009#52009-11-20T05:00+00:00

I was born and raised in south city, but needed something a little more hardcore, so went with the Old North St. Louis gut rehab house route. Does that count for something?

stlgasm · PostNov 20, 2009#62009-11-20T14:03+00:00

Barn at Barnes-- I am proud that my birth certificate says "County of Birth: St. Louis City." Raised in Creve Coeur. Developed a love for the city in junior high and my devotion for the 61 square miles of awesomeness hasn't wavered since.

I love traveling and getting to know other cities, and I certainly recognize St. Louis' shortcomings, but all in all, this is one of the greatest cities in America, and I couldn't be prouder to represent and live in the RED BRICK MAMA.

southsidepride · PostNov 20, 2009#72009-11-20T15:46+00:00

I was born in raised in St. Charles (and by that I mean the city of St. Charles, not the amorphous sprawl stretching far into St. Chuck County).

After college at MU I returned to St. Charles but I was looking to "get out". After moving around St. Louis County a couple of times and some career shifts I settled in South city 7 yrs. ago and don't see myself moving out of the city unless I leave the region entirely (every winter I vow that this will be the last--I'm trading brick buildings for the SUN of Florida or Arizona--but then spring comes and I'm happy here another 9 months

The funny thing is how great a balance city living gives me between my competing desires to both escape my hometown and be close to it. Most people I went to high school with either stayed in St. Charles County or left the state entirely. At my high school reunion there were a handful of us who live in and love the city and in addition to the great neighborhoods and restaurants that balance was something they liked too.

debaliviere · PostNov 20, 2009#82009-11-20T16:43+00:00

Like Gasm, I was born at Barnes as well (Jewish, actually).

Grew up in Des Peres in a typical 70s suburban subdivision - lots of cul-de-sacs - but always had an appreciation for older homes (thanks to my mom, who grew up in Webster, would always drive us through Webster and Kirkwood to look at the Victorians) and a fascination with downtown and skyscrapers. I remember being at one of my first Cardinal games as a little kid and standing at the railing by the ramps that went around the stadium and just staring at all the buildings. I also remember being on the deck of the Becky Thatcher on the Fourth of July, seeing Met Square being built and thinking it was so cool that downtown was getting a new tallest building. IIRC, they put the green roof on early in the construction process and kept raising it as each floor was built.

Went to high school in the city, but the school was in a rough neighborhood that scared the crap out of me more than turned me on to the city.

Nevertheless, attended SLU, and that's when I was really able to explore the city. First it was places like the Delmar, the CWE and the Landing, then Soulard, Lafayette Square, etc. It seemed like there were so many cool areas to check out, it was almost overwhelming.

Rented in DeBaliviere Place, then bought in DeBaliviere Place with a stint in TGS in between. Enjoyed TGS, but DBP just felt like home to me. Was lucky enough to meet someone who also loves the city - she lived in the CWE and North Hampton - and settled down.

Alex Ihnen · PostNov 20, 2009#92009-11-20T17:30+00:00

lukethedrifter wrote:
Grover wrote:This will be quick:

1) born and raised in small town (6K residents) Indiana

2) went to college

3) traveled abroad (Australia, Italy)

4) realized "life" (jobs/fun/friends/the unexpected) was in the city

5) followed girlfriend, now wife, to St. Louis

6) rented in CWE and U-City, bought in FPSE

It's really about jobs and education for me. I can't imagine living in a city any smaller than Cincinnati or Indianapolis simply due to the number of job opportunities, cultural events and education options.

In the end I got nothin' against a small town, but all my friends are in a big town. In fact I can breathe in a big town, have myself a ball in a big town... I guess you can take the boy out of Indiana, but.... sorry.

Very good call.

/you're wife's hot. what can i say?

midcoaststl · PostNov 20, 2009#102009-11-20T19:31+00:00

Born in St. Louis County.

Raised in Metro East (small town) about 15 mins to DT.

As a child my dad who loves architecture and cities would take me to STL and I always thought that it was cool. We would visit Chicago and other cities and I would always ask him why st. louis did not have all the skyscrapers and "life" that the other cities did.

When I went to College at U of Illinois, I met lots of friends from chicago. Most of them were suburban kids, but they loved their city. I loved St. Louis and I felt that I needed to represent it to the Chicago kids. I learned more and more about my city, and took many, many trips to STL to show them our city. I just built up a love for it. I started touring all areas of the city, lofts, condos, homes, neighborhoods etc. And I said, I want to live here one day.

Went to Graduate/Profesional school in Iowa and then Missouri and bought my loft 2 years before I graduated, and waited for it to be finished. Lived here now for over 2 years, love it... And I show everyone I can the city when they visit. I am responisble for several people moving to STL after one of my tours!

I am proud of STL's history and excited for its future. I still work outside the city but hope to open my business one day in STL CITY in NorthSide...

moorlander · PostNov 20, 2009#112009-11-20T20:27+00:00

Basically echo what Debalivier said as we have similar stories...

downtown2007 · PostNov 21, 2009#122009-11-21T03:26+00:00

Born and raised in a small town just across the river in Illinois. Although the town I was raised in was nice, from as early as I can remember I have always had a great passion for the City of St Louis. The rise, the fall, the rise, the sports teams, the history, Arch, etc. I attended a Cardinals game when I was about 8 or 9 and instead of taking home a souvenir I opted for a small chuck of crumbling sidewalk the size of my fist, just so I had a piece of the cities urban fabric.

Went on to collage in Ill where 80% of the student body was from Chicago. I would talk STL up every chance I had just to show them there was another great city in the Midwest. I had many opportunities to move to Chicago but shot them all down hoping to find a job here and move to the city. Then earlier in the decade I was offered a job in suburban STL and immediately moved to the city.

As you all know from 2000 to 2004 the city was in some dark times. Then in late 03 early 04 the city bottomed out and started to turn around as a rather fast pace. The feeling of that was truly amazing. Lived in 3 different neighborhoods however I was always fascinated with downtown. Purchased a loft downtown in 2005, ditched my suburban job landed a job downtown, and I had everything I wanted.

Even thought there are still issues present in the city I truly think there are great times down the road. By installing urban principals and progressive thinking this City could bust at the seams. And to this day I still have that piece of crumbling concrete on a shelf in my condo so I never forget one of my first St Louis experiences.

juiceinkirkwood · PostNov 21, 2009#132009-11-21T04:24+00:00

Great stories from all. Thank you.

I just knew I didn't want to talk about moving to St Louis my entire life and never do it...so I finally did it. Then I didn't want to spend the rest of my life saying I lived in suburban St Louis. I miss having family close, but I'm so glad I made the jump, even if I were to return to southern Illinois some day.

Seriously, I started telling my parents and friends I wanted to move to St Louis when I was about 5 years. I then went through a few year stint in high school where I thought moving was stupid because "We think it sucks here in Benton, but if you talk to people around a city they are just as bored with their city now that they've done everything." Then I woke up again, and found this forum. The fact is, you can never "do everything" in this city. There is always something new coming up, a new festival, a parade, hundreds of new restaurant openings, etc, etc. If I had never found UrbanSTL, the jump may have never been made. I met some great people on here and their constant encouragement and championing of the city really made my desire grow, and grow, and grow. I wouldn't change a thing now.

newstl2020 · PostNov 21, 2009#142009-11-21T06:04+00:00

Born in carbondale, raised from the age of 2 in south city. Went to college in the city (of Cincinnati), followed the g/f to the city (of St. Paul), resulting in can't waiting to get back to the city (of St. Louis...with the g/f in tow of course).

streetsabby · PostNov 21, 2009#152009-11-21T08:21+00:00

University City, South Side, CWE, Soulard and now I live Downtown. To this day, I have never been to a Wal-Mart.

stlgasm · PostNov 21, 2009#162009-11-21T16:20+00:00

streetsabby wrote:University City, South Side, CWE, Soulard and now I live Downtown. To this day, I have never been to a Wal-Mart.

Damn, streetsabby! You're a city neighborhood ho! (As in, you get around!)

lukethedrifter · PostNov 21, 2009#172009-11-21T18:55+00:00

Lived in U City til 3, a couple of years in the Boston area then WG until leaving for college. After a bit of traveling, I moved back, first to the Loop, then Southwest Garden (just west of MoBot), SoHa, Bevo, FPSE and now Shaw.

streetsabby · PostNov 22, 2009#182009-11-22T01:32+00:00

STLgasm wrote:
streetsabby wrote:University City, South Side, CWE, Soulard and now I live Downtown. To this day, I have never been to a Wal-Mart.

Damn, streetsabby! You're a city neighborhood ho! (As in, you get around!)

Hee hee!

You know it!

qcarbon · PostNov 22, 2009#192009-11-22T05:21+00:00

My history.....born NYC. Moved to Long Island then Upstate NY by 10. Went to college at SIUC. Discovered STL by then. Moved here in 1992. In chronological order - Soulard, Benton Park, Downtown -Washington ave (pre-condo days), Lafayette Square, Carondelet, Carondelet again, Downtown, Benton Park.

stlgasm · PostNov 22, 2009#202009-11-22T20:30+00:00

I'm a central corridor ho-- I currently live in the CWE, and used to live in Skinker-DeBaliviere and DeBaliviere Place. Although I live in the West End, I am proud that my business, STL-Style, is located in McKinley Heights.

matt drops the h · PostNov 22, 2009#212009-11-22T22:45+00:00

For as obsessed a St. Louis urbanite as I now am, my beginnings were very humble and non-urban.

I grew up in a pretty urban neighborhood, Bevo, but didn't live the most urban of lifestyles. I like to up the urban ante by bragging that I didn't get my driver's license until I was 19 (meaning...I walked everywhere). Yet my walking destinations were highly suburbanized: Shop N Save, fast food joints on Kingshighway; formerly, Venture.

My real awakening came when I went to SLU High as a kid with not a lot of money from the South Side. The school was putting on a food drive for newly arrived Bosnian immigrants. I decided I would volunteer, considering these were likely my neighbors. Sure enough, every house we hit was within 5 blocks of mine. We took a bus to Bevo to deliver the food, and all of my classmates were making comments like, "Let's count the crackhouses!" and "bus driver, please pull up right to the door" and "I wonder if we'll get shot before we can get the food inside."

I remember being enraged and confused at these people's ignorance. They had little to no experience in a truly urban neighborhood--and for the first time I felt a sense of difference and isolation from people who should have been my peers. SLU High, being a regional draw, tended to divide up by geography--no kidding. I knew all of the city kids, because there was definitely a stigma about being from the city. Much of it came from the surrounding neighborhood, where idiot kids would park their cars with the most expensive CD players exposed; keys in the ignition; guitars; you name it, only to find their stuff or their car stolen or broken into. I guess that was reason enough to call the quiet/small neighborhood of Kings Oak a ghetto and to generalize to the wider city.

Anyhow, going to SLUH really taught me that I needed to be able to respond to people's irrational fears and hatred of the city. I started going to the downtown library to research St. Louis history; my life has never been the same. The grandeur and the volume of the city's history, character, and culture just knocked me off my feet. So began my long and ongoing obsession with learning about every facet of the city. I arrived at the conclusion that those who couldn't appreciate such an awesome, urban place were simply ignorant and needed to be educated.

I know St. Louis has many drawbacks and a piss-poor attitude about itself, but it's given me a level of passion I could never really find in anything else. It's why I'm still on this forum despite now living/studying in New Orleans. And I'm not alone. There are plenty of obsessed expatriates who lurk here, bizarrely still interested in what's going in at X corner in a random neighborhood. This one's plotting his return--ASAP.

debaliviere · PostNov 23, 2009#222009-11-23T14:43+00:00

Matt Drops The H wrote:SLU High, being a regional draw, tended to divide up by geography--no kidding.

Very true.

streetsabby · PostNov 24, 2009#232009-11-24T07:19+00:00

Matt Drops The H wrote:For as obsessed a St. Louis urbanite as I now am, my beginnings were very humble and non-urban.

I grew up in a pretty urban neighborhood, Bevo, but didn't live the most urban of lifestyles. I like to up the urban ante by bragging that I didn't get my driver's license until I was 19 (meaning...I walked everywhere). Yet my walking destinations were highly suburbanized: Shop N Save, fast food joints on Kingshighway; formerly, Venture.

My real awakening came when I went to SLU High as a kid with not a lot of money from the South Side. The school was putting on a food drive for newly arrived Bosnian immigrants. I decided I would volunteer, considering these were likely my neighbors. Sure enough, every house we hit was within 5 blocks of mine. We took a bus to Bevo to deliver the food, and all of my classmates were making comments like, "Let's count the crackhouses!" and "bus driver, please pull up right to the door" and "I wonder if we'll get shot before we can get the food inside."

I remember being enraged and confused at these people's ignorance. They had little to no experience in a truly urban neighborhood--and for the first time I felt a sense of difference and isolation from people who should have been my peers. SLU High, being a regional draw, tended to divide up by geography--no kidding. I knew all of the city kids, because there was definitely a stigma about being from the city. Much of it came from the surrounding neighborhood, where idiot kids would park their cars with the most expensive CD players exposed; keys in the ignition; guitars; you name it, only to find their stuff or their car stolen or broken into. I guess that was reason enough to call the quiet/small neighborhood of Kings Oak a ghetto and to generalize to the wider city.

Anyhow, going to SLUH really taught me that I needed to be able to respond to people's irrational fears and hatred of the city. I started going to the downtown library to research St. Louis history; my life has never been the same. The grandeur and the volume of the city's history, character, and culture just knocked me off my feet. So began my long and ongoing obsession with learning about every facet of the city. I arrived at the conclusion that those who couldn't appreciate such an awesome, urban place were simply ignorant and needed to be educated.

I know St. Louis has many drawbacks and a piss-poor attitude about itself, but it's given me a level of passion I could never really find in anything else. It's why I'm still on this forum despite now living/studying in New Orleans. And I'm not alone. There are plenty of obsessed expatriates who lurk here, bizarrely still interested in what's going in at X corner in a random neighborhood. This one's plotting his return--ASAP.

Very Cool!!!

stlwriterman · PostNov 24, 2009#242009-11-24T16:03+00:00

I'm urban from an early age. But a St. Louisan fairly recently.

Born in Manhattan. We moved to Boston when I was five and I grew up in the city there. Went to college in the midwest and lived in downtown South Bend, Ind., for a couple of years after I graduated. Then followed my now-wife to STL where she was in grad school. Like most northeastern transplants here, I moved to the CWE. Lived there for a couple of years and developed a deep appreciation for the 'Lou, for its quirks, its faded glory, its incredible potential.

But then we moved, for work, to a small town in the far northern suburbs of NYC. Three years there was my longest-ever stint of non-urban living. I drove home to Boston or took the bus to NYC at every opportunity.

Wound up getting a job back here in St. Louis about three years ago, by which point the CWE had become too hip for me. Settled in to Tower Grove East and now we live in TGS.